Look who's 18

So it is now almost 2011. I graduate in 5 months and it seems so weird. I turned 18 a few weeks ago, and I have plans to get a tattoo. It seems like its been forever since the time I started this blog. Looking back at some of my earlier writing, it makes me think that I have slowly digressed. I really like my poetry from a few years ago, especially since I haven't written anything in a really long time. I never have the time or inspiration anymore.

I'll update all of you about the past months. After school let out, i did nothing the first part of summer, oh I did voulnteer at my high school library a few times such fun. Then, I went to Alumni Camp for FFA, which was even more fun.. yippee.. We did lots of sharing, my favorite of course. In July, I got a job at Little River Zoo. Let me just say for a first job it pretty much sucked. I had three seven hour days of training, with no pay. Then, I had three more days of training that I would have gotten paid for if I had stayed three months. Turns out I could only last two weeks of actually working. These two weeks were horrible. When you think of a zoo, what do you usually imagine people doing? Taking care of animals right? Wrong. I worked in the commissary cutting up vegetables all freaking day. One day I worked 13 hours with no lunch and no break. Then I got a lecture about working harder. Anyway once school started I quit.

High School hasn't really recquired much effort this year. I only have two classes, English IV and Calculus. College wasn't bad either, I just had political science and Spanish. My spanish teacher is awesome and she is fluent in almost 4 languages. Next semester, I am taking her class again as well as medical terminology.

Back to my work experiences. I am now employed at University Animal Hospital. It took them two months to call me back so I had pretty much given up on getting a job there, but what do you know I have been working there almost two months now. I really like it even though I have a crappy schedule. The people are all really helpful and understanding.

My life hasn't really changed that much. Besides the added stress of work, I get to worry about scholarships and the ACT. I got my latest score results from the December test. I got a 31 hooray for me, now if only that were good enough for everyone. The thing I have been thinking about lately is that I always blame everyone else for wanting me to be perfect, but I kind of put it upon myself. I don't think I could live with being average or letting people down. It really aggravates me because sometime I'm not going to be able to do something and it's going to make me go insane. Like the ACT, what if I never get higher than a 31? What would I do? The answer is I DO NOT KNOW. This sucks.

I still don't have a boyfriend and I'm starting to think I never will. I don't know how to really connect to people I don't know. Heck, I don't know how to connect to people I do know. Oh well if I'm ever a super genuis I'll just use mind control to make someone understand me. HA I amuse myself. :)

Adios No Se when I shall post again....yay for spanglish.

“I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant."

~ Robert McCloskey

“I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying."

~ Oscar Wilde

So anyway.

I have realized there is a similar quality in all of the first sentences of my blogs. Ha, I always start out by mentioning how long its been since I posted something, which is relavent. I haven't posted anything in a very log time. School is almost over now, and I have already finished my college class. So I'll do a recap.

Kayla and I took a college alebra this spring, our teacher was really nice, but he was a retired engineer which made him really boring. He was always bring up useless stuff that none of the class wanted to hear about. Speaking of the class, it was a general ed at a community college so it was basically made up of the biggest slakers in school. There were only three A's in a class of 30 and Kayla and I were two of them so there you go. The brightside is that I got to drop earth science, economics, and yearbook to take it.

Prom has come and gone, and it seems like it was even more boring than last year. I did like my dress more though. It was black, blue, yellow and green. It didn't have many embellishments on it which I loved. Kelsey's was pink yeesh and kayla's was white, they both looked really pretty. I of course got a major sunburn two days before hand at the DUI demonstation. So i had a lovely red ring down into my cleavage. Besides that it was alright, there was the usual hump train so i only danced a few songs. Oh and me and kelsey had chinese food again.

School is over in a week and I have decided not to take college classes this summer. I thought I would work on my volunteer skills and maybe try to get a job at a vet clininc. Finding somewhere to volunteer is a lot harder than you think, i figured everyone would want volunteer I mean who wouldn't it's free labor right? But it's a lot more difficult than that, you have to fill out buttloads of paperwork and can't work around animals unless a guardian is present when you are under 18. I will try my best though and hopefully have a lot of fun. Look at me being positive, I'm just so proud of myself.

Au Revoir until next time whenever that may be.

• “Only a life lived for others is a life worth while."

• “I don't know, I don't care, and it doesn't make any difference!”

~ Albert Einstein

Being Old

I know I'm not really old yet, but it does seem like I'm getting farther away from what used to be. Kindergarten, elementary school, the good times when nothing mattered except for being happy and ennjoying life. Now it's all about the grades, the schools, not looking like an idiot in front of the entire universe. Or at least that what my life mostly seems like. Even if I'm not a school I'm worry about my homework, a test I have sometimes, or sometimes I even worry about not having a life. I mean I have friends and stuff, but there is this group of friends that seems like they just have the greatest times in the world. They are spontaneous and just go out and have a good time, I wish I could do that. More often then not my friends have other things to do than hang out. It just seems like life is passing me by.

My friends started talking about the future today, and I couldn't really join in. They were talking about at what age they wanted to get married and have kids, but that isn't really important to me. Sure I want a boyfriend and to get married and have kids before I'm 40, but I want to travel. Explore the world, not just the little part of it that I've seen already. But what is a good way to say, I just want to get away from all you people so I can actually be myself. I think I'm much more interesting in my head than I am in reality. I don't try to act a certain way around myself that would just be ridiculous. But around everyone even my family, if I act a certain way I get looked at funny or treated different. I think that's the problem with being around people since you were in kindergarten. You can change, but to them you kind of always are percieved in the same way. I've always been a quiet person that kept to myself, and now that I seem to want to be involved with people, they kind of stay away from me.

Now that high school is almost overe and only one year until I'm 18 I've started to realize how different things are going to be. I mean for awhile after high school I'll probably live at home but in a few years I'll move out and have to fend for myself.I won't have friends that I've been around forever to rely on. I'll actually have to get out into the world and meet new people. And if you've ever been to anything FFA related you would now that it's a very strange experience having to work together with people you barely know. Oh well I guess I'll rant some more some other day.

The years teach much which the days never knew. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many. ~Author Unknown

Holy $#$% it's been a long time!

I haven't been on in almost a year I'm such a slacker/procrastinator. It's not like my time is absolutely inspareable or anything, even though this school year is kinda kicking my butt. I haven't even posted anything about my schedule or how the end of school was so instant recap of the last 10 months:

1st went to Florida on Spring Break which was fun

2nd the end of school was wonderful cause I had three months of no stupid High School kids

3rd I took two college classes, sociology and post civil war American history which will require their own blog to tell you about my awesome teachers.

4th I got my restriction off my license

5th school started again which I will relate details about shortly

6th One day until Thanksgiving Break

* insert after 1; I'm lazy took to much effort to retypenumbers, but I have to tell you about prom. Anyway I went with one of my friends, not a guy unfortunately no offense to Kelsey. We had chinese food with some other people then went to Prom which kind of sucked in my opinion. After prom was more fun,but not in the OMG this is so exciting way. For those of you who actually pay attention and are wondering how I went to prom since I wasn't a Junior or Senior , here it is I was an Honorary Sophomore which mean't I got to help do all the stupid crap for prom and got to attend.

Back to my normal ranting, school is uber hard , yes I said uber. Physics and Trig are difficult and time consuming, but I made A's in them the first nine weeks. Here is my schedule:

A1 Physics

A2 Earth Science

A4 Trig

3rd hour Economics

5th hour Yearbook

B1 Psychology

B2 English III

B4 Agriculture

So if you're wondering where band fits into this schedule, it doesn't. Yes, I know shocking right! I just got so fed up with no one caring except the same people who always show up, I don't like sucking much either. Then our band director's son died this year, which I feel bad cause I wasn't very supportive. However, the rumor is that he is resigning. We shall see. About my other classes, earth science is filled with some of my schools lowest ranked on the intelligence scale. There is only six people who actually have an IQ over 100, the rest couldn't reach that added up counting all 20. Psych is really boring, so is Econ. Yearbook was fun until the teacher got something stuck upher butt that she hasn't managed to get out yet. English III is a blow off class filled with Yatting Yahoos, but they actually are decently smart sometimes. Ag is basically study hall until I have to start my speech. I can't wait till next semester when I can drop three and do concurrent enrollment. I will try to update more, I know you have heard that before, so you know I'm unreliable and can't be trusted to hold that promise.

“The pain of parting is nothing to the joy of meeting again." ~Charles Dickens

“Never promise more than you can perform."~Publilius Syrus

OMG IDK WIHP FSL

I cant believe I havent posted in like 4 months. I didnt even post anything to say I got my license which I've had for over a month now. Its really weird that I can drive even though I'm pretty used to it now and I don't really remember what it was like when I didnt have my license and couldnt drive. People always ask me if they can have a ride now its really quite a burden.

I love my car though and so does everyone else at my skool. Since it's an 05' mustang, but it bottoms out really bad especially when I have more than three people in it. I also hate those stupid little concrete things you park behind. If you have a car as low to the ground as mine you know what I mean. Everytime I park behind one I always end up either like 3 feet back or to close and scrape my front bumper on it. Who knew driving was so difficult when ur not even on the road!

Besides that not much has happened. Skool is half over which is awesome, but I have pig show and a speech contest nect month. I'm definitely not looking forward to those. Oh Well MAYBE i'LL POST SOME MORE LATER THIS WEEKEND.//////MAYBE.

“The best thing about the future is that it comes only one day at a time."

First Week

Well technically it was the first three days of school. So school started and it feels like there was never a summer at all. Everyone is basically how they looked three months ago. It was like we were on pause and someone hit the play button again. My classes are ok and I don't think they are going to be that hard. Here is my schedule:

A1 Spanish II

A2 Geometry

B1 English II

B2 Ag

3rd Hour Band

A4 Computer Science

B4 Chemistry

5th hour American History

My least favorite class is American History because all the people in that class talk all the time so we are going to end up having a whole bunch of extra work. Of course the teacher is in a bad mood all class because of the people so it's not very fun. Computer science is probably going to be my easiest class because im on the computer all the time so I know how most things work.

It's really different this year because for the past two years I've had classes with the same people because wew were in "advanced" classes. But this year they broke us up. It's going to be harder this year, since we all used to basically work together on everything. Not cheat, but usually if one person couldn't find the answer somebody else could. At least I have someone I talk to in every class. I would die of boredom if I didn't.

It's funny how people get over some things easily and some things are harder to get over. I decided not to talk to one of my friends for the last month of summer. I go back to school figuring she would be ticked off at me. During lunch I ask her a few questions about her summer and were back to being friends again. It reminds me pf how guys can get in a fight , like fists and everything, and in the next five minutes they are buddies again. I get it's how simple the matter is or something. People are just too complex to try and spend timefiguring them out. And I think that's one of my problems I always try to figure things out.

"It doesn't matter how much you want. What really matters is how much you want it. The extent and complexity of the problem does not matter as much as does the willingness to solve it.”

"Technical skill is mastery of complexity, while creativity is mastery of simplicity"

School

Omg I can't believe I haven't posted anything since June. That was two months ago. I'm really sorry I slacked off so much and here I thought I would post alot more since it was the summer.
Well I guess I'll start where I left off. Back in June.

So not much really happened the rest of June except I went to my yearly Indian pow wow for a day. Usually all I do there is buy stuff. This year I got three shirts, a picture, and two book marks signed bythe artist. Then, we have July. I didn't do much for fourth of July. We drove up to the casino and watched their fireworks.

I didn't have much time to myself after that because my family from Michigan came to visit. My aunt, uncle, and three younger cousins. A three year old, six year old, and a nine year old. let's just say I didn't get to sleep late in the mornings. I also didn't get to sleep in my own room. I had to sleep in justin's room and they got to sleep in mine. The good thing was they kept Jessie occupied.

It was a really hectic day when they got there. Besides them coming my dog Lizzie had puppies. Her labor lasted all day and part of the next. we got really worried because she kept having them so we took her to the vet. Overally she had ten puppies but only five made it. Three girls and two boys. They are half golden retriever and half sheepdog/mutt. All of them except one are goldish. The other one is all black. Right now they are getting so big and really cute! We can only keep one though. Personally I like the two boys. And if we keep one I'm going to name him ozzie.

The first day of August Breaking Dawn came out and I went to the midnight release part. It was slightly boring, not really what I expected it to be. August hasn't been very good so far. For one all week I had band practice out in the heat for three hours a day. It was pointless because the first week off school we have to go over it all again because only fifteen people showed up each day. The other reason is that I got my schedule and I din;t get the one class I really wanted because the teacher left. I'm also not in very many classes as my friends.

Oh well I guess school will be ok I usually just overeact to the beginning of school. I will try to post more, but don't hold me to that.

“School is like a lollipop. It sucks until it is gone.”

“I've been making a list of the things they don't teach you at school. They don't teach you how to love somebody. They don't teach you how to be famous. They don't teach you how to be rich or how to be poor. They don't teach you how to walk away from someone you don't love any longer. They don't teach you how to know what's going on in someone else's mind. They don't teach you what to say to someone who's dying. They don't teach you anything worth knowing.”