Being Alone

Sometimes I really think about that saying you know the "Even in a crowd of people I've never felt so alone". I feel like that a lot and I know it's not true. I have awesome friends and semi-awesome family. So I'm really not alone, but I can't help feeling that way.

I used to think when I got older I would move away from my family and live up north by myself. The more I think about it now though I think I would get really lonely. Truly I don't think I could do it now. Maybe it's because I practically fell in love ,so maybe now I really know what it's like to want to be with someone. My mom seemed like someone who needed someone else and I didn't want to be like that. Now, I kinda think I'm getting that way,but I'm not like my mom in other ways.I really don't want to be like my mom, it just bothers me the stuff she does sometimes. I'm probably more like her than I realize, but I'm not going to admit to it.

I was thinking about all that stuff when I was trying to go to sleep last night. I do that a lot too, get really good blogging ides when I'm trying to go to sleep. And I'm like I'll just blog about it tomorrow then I forget or something. I really hate it when I do that. There are two blogs I really need to write I just haven't got around to them yet. Maybe this weekend maybe not.I had a really bad head ache today. I think I got it from all the idiotic people in my fourth hour, I really hate those people. Good thing I have friends to keep me occupied or I'd try to shoot myself, not kidding.

"To be stupid and selfish and to have good health are the three requirements for happiness, though if stupidity is lacking, the others are useless."

This quote reminds me of something one of my friends said today after we got out of the stupid class. She said I know how you can get a boyfriend; basically she said to act like all those people and be stupid sluts. Then we both agreed it would be better to be boyfriendless than be like them.